Metta is a concentration practice to cultivate unconditional goodwill for all. It is practised by reciting and contemplating a series of aspirations or prayers that express your goodwill and unstoppable friendliness toward yourself and others. With each recitation, you expand the scope of your loving-kindness—from yourself, to those close to you, to those for whom you feel antipathy, and finally to all sentient beings. 

Understanding Loving Kindness (Metta)

"Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries. Without them, humanity cannot survive."

― Dalai Lama

Loving kindness, or metta, is a quality of the heart that encompasses friendliness, compassion, goodwill, and a genuine desire for the well-being and happiness of oneself and others. It is an unconditional and inclusive love that transcends boundaries, prejudices, and differences.

The practice of metta involves cultivating this boundless love first towards oneself, then extending it outward to loved ones, acquaintances, neutral individuals, and even those with whom we may have difficulties or conflicts.

At its core, metta teaches us to embrace a mindset of kindness and understanding, acknowledging all beings' shared humanity and inherent worth. This practice is not about denying or suppressing negative emotions but rather transforming them through compassion and empathy.

Loving-Kindness Meditation (LKM): A Concentration Practice

Loving-kindness meditation (LKM) is a form of concentration practice that involves repeating specific phrases or intentions aimed at cultivating loving-kindness. The traditional phrases used in LKM may vary, but they often include wishes such as:

• May I be happy.

• May I be healthy. 

• May I be safe. 

• May I live with ease.

The practice typically begins with directing these wishes towards oneself, then gradually expanding to include others systematically. This progression helps strengthen the capacity for empathy, compassion, and connection.

• May you/they be happy.

• May you/they be healthy.

• May you/they be safe.

• May you/they live with ease.

By giving loving kindness to oneself, we can better benefit others around us as we radiate love and positivity outwards. This practice of loving kindness towards ourselves and others also reminds us of our interconnectivity with all sentient beings. We are a network of relationships that requires loving kindness towards each other so that we may thrive and grow together harmoniously.

As a concentration practice, LKM involves focusing the mind on these phrases or intentions, allowing them to permeate one's thoughts and feelings. By repeatedly returning to the chosen phrases with sincerity and openness, one can develop greater mindfulness, emotional resilience, and a sense of interconnectedness.

Practising loving kindness is not only cultivated by being on the meditation cushion, but also in our daily lives as we begin to transform and apply loving kindness to different situations.

Loving Kindness as a daily practice

Here are some ways to integrate metta into your daily life

• Start each day with metta meditation: Begin your day with metta meditation and loving-kindness meditation, setting positive intentions for yourself and others.

• Practice mindful listening: When engaging with others, practice active listening with an open heart, seeking to understand and empathize rather than simply responding.

• Offer acts of kindness: Perform acts of kindness towards everyone, both big and small, to spread positivity and compassion in your environment.

• Cultivate gratitude: Regularly reflect on and appreciate the kindness and support you receive from others, expressing gratitude sincerely.

• Respond with compassion: When faced with challenges or conflicts, pause and respond with compassion and understanding, recognizing the shared humanity in every situation.

• Take breaks to practice loving kindness: As you go about your daily life, take a few breaks each day to incorporate the practice of loving kindness in your routines and activities. This can be thinking about how you wish all beings to be happy, or sending loving kindness to yourself by wishing yourself to be happy. You can even pick a person to think about and wish for their wellbeing too.

Benefits of Living with Loving Kindness and LKM

• Enhanced emotional well-being: Regular practice of LKM can lead to increased resilience, and reduced stress, anxiety, and negative emotions while promoting feelings of joy, gratitude, and contentment.

• Improved relationships: Cultivating loving kindness through LKM fosters empathy, understanding, and forgiveness, which can strengthen interpersonal relationships and communication.

• Increased self-compassion: LKM encourages offering loving kindness to oneself, leading to greater self-acceptance, self-esteem, and resilience in the face of challenges.

• Greater mindfulness: LKM cultivates present-moment awareness and helps in letting go of rumination, judgement, and reactive patterns of thinking.

• Contribution to a more compassionate world: As individuals embody loving kindness in their daily lives and through LKM, they become agents of positive change, promoting kindness, empathy, and inclusivity in their communities.
  
  

Conclusion 

“You are not a drop in the ocean. You are the entire ocean in a drop.”
― Rumi

Living with loving kindness can profoundly transform our inner landscape and ripple outwards to impact the world. By nurturing qualities of empathy, compassion, and joy through metta, we not only enhance our well-being but also contribute to creating a more harmonious and compassionate society. May we all cultivate loving kindness in our hearts and incorporate LKM as a concentration practice to illuminate the path of peace and understanding.

If you are looking for a community to support you in your practice, Thekchen Choling Temple organises prayer activities and other courses that can help integrate you into a supportive community.